To start off I'm going to go over just the basics of my viewpoints on abortion to better help you understand the impact of my particular "view changing" instance. Now I have never been totally for or against abortion. Part of me thinks regardless of what stage the fetus is at, it could potentially be a person one day, if all went well with the pregnancy, therefore aborting it is stripping that little being at their chance of life. However the other part of me understands why someone may want to abort their child for numerous reasons as well. There is often the argument of adoption, which in theory is a great idea, however carrying a child for 9 months and giving it up is something I personally would never be able to get ove; it would destroy me to know my child was out there and I had no part in it's life. Then people may say "you shouldn't have had sex in the first place", well I'm here to tell you in life shit just happens. You don't plan on having a baby every time you have sex, and you don't always have sex at an appropriate life stage where if you were to get pregnant you could afford to care for the child. So yes I get why abortion can be handy, but that does not mean I am 100% for it either.
Growing up and in high school I though I had it all figured out. I was on my birth control, I was careful when engaging in sexual activities, and I always thought to myself if something happened and I were to get pregnant I'd just get an abortion and that would be the end of it. This however until I had my first, and only, actual pregnancy scare. I don't want to go in to graphic details, but bottom line at the time this happened I had been off my birth control because it was the week after the week you don't take the pills and I hadn't began taking them again, and of course the one time this would happen the condum would break. Well my partners was hysterically freaking out so I conforted him and told him what he needed to hear to calm him down for the time being even though I was freaking out inside. The odd thing is when I woke up the next morning I was not consernerd whatsoever; and the same for the following day as well. Internally I was struggling with the decision to get PlanB for some unknown reason. My partner had offered to pay for it and everything, but for some reason I didn't want to get it. Finally on the third day, last minute possible, my friends basically forced me to go get it, so I did. For months after that I didn't drink, I ate all the right foods, and took extreme caution with my body. I didn't get a period for 2 months following the incident so I seriously thought I was pregnant. I eventually took a test and figured out I wasn't thankfully. My partner and I came to the conclusion that we needed to decide what we were going to do if I were to ever actually get pregnant, and after that experience I truly was at a loss of words. Before I would've said abortion hands down, but in those few short months you would be surprised how quickly my maternal instincts kicked in, and I wasn't even really pregnant. All I could say to him was that I hoped that the good lord would never test me in that way, because if he did I really don't think I could go through with an abortion and I sure as hell would never put my child up for adoption. If I ever got pregnant I think I would have to keep it. I really don't think I could deal with the thought of my unborn child, or the thought of my child being somewhere out in the world being raised by people I didn't even know. That small event really opened up my eyes and got me thinking about a lot of things after that.
Victoria, thank you for posting such a personal connection with this topic. It really does make it all more tangible to understand. It is amazing how we can think one thing if something, like pregnancy, happens but when it actually does everything does change and decisions can be made that at first would never be thought of! Also, another interesting thing you said that stood out to me was that you could never put your child up for adoption. That definitely must be one of the hardest things to go through and for you to almost have to decide whether or not must have been life changing! Thanks again for sharing :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing a personal experience you've had! This is one of the many stories that make me think twice about the actions I take. Many people who take birth control pills often find themselves in situations they thought they were saving themselves from. It is easy to believe that you won’t get pregnant when you’re taking the pills, so you never really think of a plan in the case that you do get pregnant. The first decision most people think of is abortion, but I have to say I also don’t think I would be able to go through with it. A lot of my friends say that they wouldn’t be able to live with the fact that they gave their child up for adoption, but I think that is much better than having an abortion. I'm also not completely against or for abortions, but people make mistakes and things happen. Everyone’s situations are different and who am I to judge?
ReplyDeleteI can completely relate to you. Growing up, I've realized sometimes decisions you think would be simple to make can actually be the hardest when it gets done to making them. I'm proud of you for eating right and taking care of yourself when you were suspicious that you were pregnant; even though it turned out not to be true, you've really proved yourself as maternal and, when the time comes, it sounds like you'll do a pretty good job.
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